Gadgets are Great

*** Updated: Very Cute Vintage Clip Art Removed Due to Copyright Concerns *****

Before Christmas, our family was invited to someone’s house for dinner. She described a special machine she used to clean her floor, some kind of durable gadget that worked magic on hard, tile floors. She cooked a fantastic tenderloin in a George Foreman rotisserie machine. She mentioned yet another gadget for something else, and I turned to The Belgian Wonder and exclaimed, “Now I know why I’m such an unsuccessful homemaker–I need more gadgets! I don’t have nearly enough gadgets!”

I have a vacuum, the tank kind. It’s a Kenmore. It’s fine.

A broom. A dustpan. The dustpan attaches to the handle of the broom, so that’s an interesting little feature that almost qualifies it as a gadget.

I have a crockpot and a bread machine, but that’s about it in the household gadget department. Unless you count the toaster. It is, if I may be allowed to brag about my toaster, a four-slotter.

Anyway, I seem to have spoken the magic word at my friend’s house that night.

The Belgian Wonder’s Christmas-gift antenna zeroed in on that wondrous word–gadgets–and my computer science major spouse happily went out shopping.

If the wife wants gadgets, he thought, I’ll get her gadgets!

Christmas morning he handed me a rectangular box longer than a shoebox and heavier. “This is for you.”

Hm….I couldn’t even imagine what it might be. All I could do was find out, so I ripped off the paper to uncover Impressive Gadget #1: a Dust Buster!

And people, can I tell you how this has revolutionized my life in a few short days?

First there are the stairs. Oh, my, how I hate vacuuming the stairs with that awkward tank vacuum. I feel like I’m rototilling the side of a mountain while wrestling a Vietnamese potbellied pig.

But now, with my Dust Buster, it’s almost effortless. I can keep up with the fern in the bathroom that’s dropping a few leaves. I can suck up flakes of oatmeal that spill on the kitchen floor lickety-split. Someone tracks in chunks of dirt? Don’t worry–I’ve got it!

I just pop that gadget out of its charger and prowl around the house looking for dust to be busted. I feel like I should have a before and after picture taken of myself. Now that I’m a Dust Buster user, I’m like an ad featuring a 1950s housewife enjoying a delirious sense of domestic freedom, power and success thanks to her shiny new household gadgets.

But that’s not all.

Inside the last box of the morning, a tall box that he couldn’t figure out how to wrap, sat Impressive Gadget #2: A trash can.

But not just any trash can–this is a gleaming stainless steel trash can with a foot pedal and slow-rising lid. It even lowers in slow-motion, so the dog’s nose won’t be clamped down on when he’s sniffing the leftovers.

You know you’re living in a land of plenty when you can own a luxurious, high-end trash can. And even though it seems wrong to me from a global poverty perspective, I can’t help myself–I’m still a little giddy when I step on that lever to spit out my gum.

Just like water from the fridge door seems a little magical to me.

Gadgets really can be great. I admit it, while other women were unwrapping jewels or sweaters, I was delighted with a Dust Buster and trash can. As Boomama would say, I’m klassy like that.

And speaking of gadgets, I did forget one that I’ve owned for almost 17 years. We used it just yesterday morning.

The waffle iron.